It's Done

Well, it's now a done deal.

Yesterday, we took our paperwork to the Family Law division of Superior Court and filed for the divorce. Just two hours after that, Sandy drove off in her packed car to start her new life.

I spent the majority of the day cleaning and making it into my house. At least as much as one can without much effort.

I felt out of sorts all day. I couldn't do anything. Trying to shake the disoriented feeling. A lot of disruption to how I've known my life in a very short time.

A few things are up to talk about. Will  post in a day or so.

Two Days And A Wake Up...

As I sit in my "room" here on Christmas morning, it seems that the best gift that I am going to get (and likely give) this year is that of a future for Sandy and I that isn't an extension of our past. In a very short time, that gift will arrive and it's all up for grabs then. Neither of us knows where it's going to go, but we do know that we're going.

I am going to remember this Christmas for the rest of my life.

The End Is Near

Since our first round of conversations on Saturday, things have been a bit "dicey" with Sandy. Yeah, there's a discernible tension in the air between us. Even when we're around others, it's completely noticeable. There's no longer any appearance of being a couple. It's clear that we are parting. It makes it hard for people around us sometimes, as it's likely more difficult for them than us.

Today Was Hard

I spent the day today working with Sandy on our separation agreement. It was actually one of my hardest days thus far. So many things about it were uncomfortable. I can almost not even just choose one that stands out more than another.

Some days I hate my life and this was one of them.

Holiday Cheer and Latest Updates

I've been slacking on my blogging, but it's not because nothing has been going on. Not even close. In fact, there's quite a bit happening on several fronts. If I had to choose a word to summarize it, that word would be "WOW!". Yeah, it's been like that.

Let's take them one at a time, shall we?

The Vortex

I don't know if there's any other way to describe it, when things go South with Sally and I, they don't just go South -- they go off the rails. As you might imagine, that's never a good thing. This time had a few twists to it that were interesting.

Meeting with Sally...

Sally called and asked me to meet her to talk. Headed there now. It'll either be great or terrible -- nothing in between. It's a very unusual move for her. I'm actually scared.

The Unwinding

So much has been happening in my life, I can barely keep up with it. Often I feel like I am on the ragged edge of sanity -- potentially "losing it" if it just gets "a little bit worse". Yeah, it's like that.

Surprise Works Both Ways

Heh. Just when I thought I was being all slick, all of a sudden Sally changes the game on me.

Surprise, Surprise!

Well, yesterday with Sally was great. Incredible even. I don't think I could have planned it better.

Today's Updates

Just a quick update for today:

1. I spoke with the new gal that I wrote about yesterday and she sounds really great. I've been working way too hard this weekend, otherwise we would have tried to arrange a meeting today. I'm really looking forward to that.
2. Sally and I will be seeing each other tomorrow. Logistics are all planned out. I have a couple of surprises planned for her.

I am going to have to do some thinking here over the next few weeks about how Sally and I will start discussing our future together (or a lack thereof). I'm now getting enough traction that I can see that there will be a point where I am going to have to choose my path. I know what I want, but I only have part of the say in that. Anyhow, it's certainly going to be interesting.

Interesting Day

Well, life in the dating world is interesting.

My "coffee date" today went well and the main objective was achieved -- I got out and had a good time. She's a very nice lady and we enjoyed each others company, but no real sparks out of the gate.

Made a new connection on the dating site that is very promising. We've been exchanging quite a bit of IM today and so far she's been a lot of fun. I'm going to call tomorrow and talk with her in person. See where that one goes.

If nothing else, I am forcing myself to get outside of my comfort zone and meet new people. Nothing wrong with that! :-)

It's Very Nice To Meet You...

Well, it's going to be a banner week for meeting women. No, I'm not kidding. I'm serious. Two significant "dates" (of sorts).

It's kinda hard to explain. It all started earlier this week...

Inexplicably Happy

Yes, that's the way I'd describe myself today. I'm not sure why, but I am.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thanksgiving And Giving Thanks

For my international readers, tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day here in the U.S. Actually, it's not here yet, but it's close.

I tend to take holidays somewhat seriously, especially as I am getting older. Why? Well, I guess I am finding that I have more to be thankful for and to appreciate. So, the significance and opportunity that a given holiday represents isn't lost on me.

The way that I see it, this Thanksgiving is even more significant because I'm thinking of this as the first Thanksgiving of the rest of my life.

And Now For Something Completely Different...

Remember that I said that I wasn't a betting man? Heh. It's a good thing.
Yesterday was a very interesting day.

Sally and I had our lunch.
It didn't turn out anything like I thought it would.

Gunfight At The OK Corral

I've never been much of a betting man. In fact, I tend to be pretty horrible at it. I think I'm missing all of the core skills one needs to be good at it. Still, I am betting that today will not be a good day and there's absolutely nothing I can do about it. Why?

Because my choices are always influenced by the wrong things. I say the wrong stuff at the wrong time. My timing is off. I zig when I should zag. I speak when I should shut up and vice versa. Well, you get the picture. It's not a pretty one, I can assure you that.

It seems as though all roads have been leading to this single event -- what I am calling the "gunfight at the OK corral".

I Make Her (Literally) Sick [Updated]

This just in.

Sally had been having pretty severe physiological issues that were ultimately diagnosed as stress related. From what she could tell it all came back to me. As of today, she's been symptom free for three days. Good for her.

It's nice to know the effect one has on others. It sure makes me feel good about myself.

---

As it turns out, the declaration of victory was slightly premature. The symptoms have since returned, without any action on my part. So maybe I'm not as an important a factor in this as I would think. Just spitballing here... LOL

The Last Word on Sally?

When it comes to Sally, I don't think I will really ever have a "last word". There will always be something to think about or something to consider. Some element that is worthy of examining for a lesson learned.

Well, I think I may have hit the unique set of circumstances that closes the door completely with her.

Why? Let me explain.

The Mediator And A Wake Up [Long Posting]

Wow. Another intense 24 hours... well, actually less than 12 at this point. Damn. This is just wearing me out. I'm actually cursing a lot, but not actually writing it down -- purely for your benefit, dear reader. It doesn't add anything (except when it does, I will) and it just helps my emotions stay ramped up. I know that it's all based in reaction and I hate reacting. I know I do it, I watch for it and try to avoid doing it, but there are times I will anyway. The real key is how long it takes to recover myself when I do. That period decreases consistently over time -- I am taking ground with it. Now, on to the last 12 hours...

Perception Is(n't) Reality

To say that this has been a thoroughly screwed week would not be an exaggeration. While there have been some OK portions to it, most of it has truly sucked. I am very sincere about that. I haven't even gotten to today yet... still catching up from earlier in the week.

Misunderstandings-R-Us

Well, it was another example of exactly how dangerous assumptions are. As it turns out, Sally and I were in two completely different conversations.

She read my e-mail and went ape shit (technical term, thank you). I got three voice mails before 7 AM today and we even exchanged several rounds of text messages. All of which weren't doing either of us any good. Following that, we talked on the phone today for well over two hours this morning and we repaired what looked like it was irreparable. It's a real testament to communication.

Neither of us knows what our future holds together, but we do know we have some future together. We are something more than friends and something less than lovers. Exactly what that is will be worked out over time and I'm good with that.

If there was a lot to debrief before, there's a lot more to do now!

Tonight Was Goodbye

Well, this is going to be a short post, because I've got to get to bed. Early morning tomorrow.

I sent a final goodbye and farewell note to Sally tonight.
I'd finally had enough of the bullshit. Will provide details later. Lots to debrief.

It's her life. She can lead it how she sees fit.
I'll always love her and I hope this makes her happy.

No one can say that I didn't try my best.
In the meantime, I have my own life to lead.

What Pisses Me Off

So, after I went back and re-read the text message to me, I started to get a little pissed off. Here's why.

We were having an exchange via IM (as I noted earlier) and I had to go run an errand. I told her so and went out. Earlier that morning, I had scheduled an auto-posting of a social media update to my account which talked about my need to go exercise, because my stress level was at such a high point. Apparently, this is the place where she lost it and found she could no longer deal with me.

The part that really pisses me off is that it gives the distinct impression as though my problems with her are the sole source of stress in my life! That's not only wrong, it's a complete crock of shit.

It's the height of hubris. How dare she take that comment as being all about her. I sent her a note back and told her the equivalent without being nasty about it. Yes, it does play a role, but that's just a portion of what I'm dealing with. And, at this point, it's a way smaller portion than she is giving herself credit for.

Perhaps I have placed too much faith in or given her too much credit for what I thought our relationship was about.

When Too Much Is Just Too Much

Well, it looks like Sally is starting to shut down, implode or whatever you want to call it. Seems that she has just had too much and cannot take it any more. She sent me a text message and told me the rough equivalent of this. I sent a note back to her asking that she reconsider and not "toss the baby out with the bath water".

She seems to think that just disconnecting will do the trick. Ultimately, it may provide some short-term relief, but it won't make things better. It doesn't really address what there is to address, which is why I say it won't work. Of course, she needs to decide upon that for herself. I cannot. Nothing I can or will say can override her choosing the path forward.

Again, only time will tell. If that's what she needs to do, then so be it.

Current Weather Conditions

Sally asked me today how I was doing and my response was:

"Cold and overcast with an 80% chance of showers"

Yeah, that's how I feel. I don't mean to rain on anyone's parade, but that's the truth about it.

The Next Evolution

Day 1 was a bit of a mixed bag. Very, very stressful. So much stuff in such a short period. There was a little "spillage", but overall it was not terrible. I found that I was just very sad, but I went about my day with a muted smile on my face. I kept my "game face" on for the rest of the world to see. It pretty much worked as advertised, despite the fact that I felt like I was dying inside. Not at all pleasant, I can assure you.

I hadn't spoken with Sally all day. In fact, I did everything I could to keep her out of my mind. Not much of it worked. It's kind of like when you drive by a horrific car crash... you don't want to look, you know you won't like what you see, but you look at it anyway. Really, kind of like that. Then came the evening...

Suffering In Silence

I did manage to sleep, but I woke up extra early... and not because I wanted to. Actually, the earliest I have in a long time. Going to make for a thoroughly screwed day, I think. My customary chirpy optimism and "glass half full" perspective has had the shit beat out of it and has definitely turned "glass half empty". This morning I am feeling it.

It's taking everything that I've got to not be bitter and angry about how this has gone down.

Me, Myself and I

Yep, that's who's left. Just the three of us. Why?
Because Sally is no more.
That's right. She's no more.

I am going to be thinking and writing a lot about this, but not tonight.
Yet, tonight keeps going... and I'm just sitting here dumbfounded and dazed.
The thoughts and emotions are just overwhelming at the moment.

I can safely say that "Plan A" is now complete.
What do I do from here?
I honestly don't know.

The Countdown Begins

Well, if it wasn't real enough, it's gotten much more real for both Sandy and I. Today we talked about logistics and what was happening when. Whoa. A lot to do and not much time.

One Foot In, One Foot Out...

There comes a time in each persons life where they need to make choices. Tough choices. You need to look yourself in the mirror and decide what you want to do. Today was one of those days.

On Being Alone...

Being separated isn't entirely bad. You know, in many ways, this is very good for me. No kidding. There are lots of aspects to this that do work. Others? Well, not so much.

We're Off To See The Lawyer!

Well, this is a pretty big step -- we've committed to seeing a lawyer about starting the paperwork process for our separation. It'll serve as the foundation for any divorce proceedings that will follow. We're going to schedule the appointment for next Friday (time is TBD).

Getting To Know You

Yes, I know there's a song like this, but that wasn't what I was thinking of. Specifically, I was thinking of something that Sally said to me. She wanted to get to know every little thing about me. At the time, I thought "that's great". Of course, now I'm like "OK, now what!?".

To Tell The Truth...

No, I don't intentionally lie or withhold aspects of the truth, but you just can't go around blurting out whatever is on your mind. That's just as damaging as withholding -- sometimes even worse. I figured that my day with Sally yesterday would give me the time to talk with her and bring out some of the points I was hoping to make in the letter I had started writing.

As it turns out, the opportunity did present itself.

Know Thy Limits

Most of my posts have a certain theme to them -- my reflecting upon something that I am thinking or feeling. I don't think that this will be much different from that, but it will expand a little bit from the normal. Why? Because it's relevant.

In the late hours...

... is when I do some of my best (or perhaps my worst) thinking. It's that time of the night where I finally begin to relax from the activity of the day and just let everything wash over me. It's both freeing and torturous. Weird, isn't it? Yeah, I'll say.

The "write stuff"... and other errata

Yes, throw stones at me, if you will. I know that this was a terrible pun. I just couldn't help myself. :-)

OK. I am "knee deep" in writing the letter... which is what made the pun so much fun! I think this letter is a doozy!

I can't wait to see how the story ends. LOL

Time To Write "The Letter"

Sounds ominous, doesn't it? Yeah, I know. It does. To a certain extent, I guess it is. I have been thinking about this a lot over the past few days. I've been re-reading some of the communications between Sally and I. I've been considering what to write and haven't gotten very far.

I guess it'll be done the way that I like to blog -- sit down and start, the rest will work itself out. Surely that cannot be bad, right? Heh. Right...

The problem that I have at the moment is that as I start thinking of it, I visualize myself writing a "War and Peace" length note to her. I have neither the time nor the inclination to do that. Still, there are things that need to be said and they are going to get said.

I guess it'll come out how it comes out. Time to start writing, I guess... :-D

Was It Evident All Along?

A friend of ours (Sandy and I) called me this morning. She wanted to express her support for me during this transition period, as she is a friend to both of us, not just Sandy.

It was a very interesting call and went in a direction that I didn't anticipate. Let me explain...

I've Moved Out Of The House

So, after a short discussion, Sandy asked me to move out of the house until she could move out. Given I do have a place where I can go and it seems better that we be apart, I said yes. I'm now in a new "home".

It may sound bad, but it's really not. Why? Let me explain.

Sowing The Seeds Of Reasonable Doubt? [Updated]

So I have a tendency to over-think things at times, OK? I know that. At the same time, I am also fairly intuitive. I know when something is up; when it's not right. I got that sense today from Sally.

It's Hard To Leave

No, that's not what I meant at all. Yes, I knew what you were thinking. :-)

I was thinking about my time tonight with Sally. It really is an important thought. It was hard to leave. A line has been crossed and we both know it.

Undo Or Keep Going?

As I mentioned in my last post, there have been a number of changes on the relationship front with Sally. These have been significant and important. All indications demonstrate that there may indeed be a future for the two of us. I am very happy about this and have no complaints.

But it does now present an issue that I have to deal with. As it turns out, my "marketing efforts" to start dating and such have been pretty successful. Actually, much more successful than I'd originally anticipated they would be. That's both the good news and the bad news.

What's a guy to do? :-)

It's A Brand New Day

Over the past few weeks, I've pretty much written off a future with Sally. It's not been easy. In fact, it's been a time filled with a lot of emotion and pain... neither of which I feel that I handle particularly well. Then, I guess that may be more of a broad-based issue with people, than something that is just unique to me.

I'd been preparing for the inevitable and with good reason. Last Friday, everything came to a head. I gained new insight into the situation and realized what I needed to do was the one thing that I didn't want to do. I needed to walk away of my own accord and set Sally free to live a life without me... and that's exactly what I did.

Everything was moving along fine, until last night. That's when everything changed.

"Plan B" - Moving From Thought To Action

Well, after the first split with Sally a few weeks ago and the formalization of my separation from Sandy, I decided that it was now time to kick things into high gear.

It was time to meet new women who might be interested in me.

Who's Sorry Now

Heh. A pretty strange post title that pretty well fits a strange evening, strange dreams and a strange wake up this morning.

"A Bad Penny Always Returns To You..."

Or in my case, Sandy returns home from her trip on Monday afternoon. I'm looking as forward to this as I would being in a position where I needed to do my own dental surgery on myself with home power tools.

If you are thinking that I don't think this is a good thing, your powers of perception are not off. I don't like it. I don't like it at all. I'm at a point where I want to be done with her. Really.

Trip Debrief - Part 2

Well, at this point, I consider the immediate part after returning home just as much a part of the trip as the trip itself.

Indeed, it seems that what seemed like the end of the trip may have been a bit premature.

Why? Well, Sally and I started exchanging IM last night.

Trip Debrief - Part 1

OK. A lot happened over the past four days. More than I'd ever anticipated.

From one perspective, it was a perfect four days. From another perspective it was a complete tragedy.

Why? Let's have a look...

It's Over

OK. This stage of my life and my physical relationship with Sally is officially over. I played full out, we had a great time together and I kept my promise to her. There's a lot to think and write about this. More to come...

Trip Is A GO!

Very, very excited. This will be a great few days with Sally. Really looking forward to it!

It's A Good Fit...

Well, the Halloween costume that is! In the post "I can't do this anymore...", I talked about the costume that I purchased and was going to surprise Sally with on our trip. Well, I tried it on last night and it looked awesome on me.

Not to be overly impressed with myself, but I've got a very shapely body now. Almost to the point where I'm just about as manly as the superhero costume. Not quite where I want to be yet, but closer! :-D

I hope I'll get the chance to use it at some point -- She'll absolutely FLIP!!! I've even practiced the accent for her... :-)

A Gift To Wake Up To

One of the things I've known for a while is that Sally likes to get up early in the AM when she can. What I didn't know is why. She told me that she rarely gets the chance to have any alone time and that is likely her only opportunity to get it. I hadn't really thought of that before and it made good sense to me. What's my point? I'm getting there... :-)

"3,2,1... Houston, we have separation"

Heh. OK. My life isn't a space mission. While it may be complex, it's not expensive (yet), bad for the environment (except the relational one) or potentially lethal (whew, no witty retort there...). Still, this was the first full work week that Sandy and I have been apart. It's been an interesting week.

The More Things Change...

... the more things stay the same. At least that's the way the old saying goes. Given my current circumstances, that very well may be true. It's been another strange 24 hours. Just when I think that I have some idea of what the hell is happening, something changes.

Should I Stay Or Should I Go???

Our trip next week is going to be an important one. As I stated before, it's my intention that we come to a new level of understanding on this trip and help to relieve some of the stress that our relationship represents. And I know that Sally is really feeling it right now. So, I made her this offer:

We will take the time to talk it through and come to a new level of understanding OR I will leave of my own accord.

I am perfectly fine with this approach. It's not my intention to cause her distress, if there's nothing workable there. And I trust that when we are together and we actually talk (not exchange of IM), good things can come of it. If nothing else, it's a huge bet, but it's one worth making

If it all ends next week, so be it. We can both be complete about it and satisfied that we did all we could. If not, then we'll have a foundation to work off of. Neither result is bad. The way things were left this week definitely was.

Getting To The Bottom Of It....

Well, yesterday was an interesting day, to say the least. Sally and I had a chance to talk last night and it was good. Things are always better when we talk. I know that communication works... there's plenty of evidence for that.

The Emotional Roller Coaster

Right about now, I'm feeling a bit queasy. This is a terrible ride and I'd like to get off...

It has been a day from hell. I've been totally unproductive and am just about spent emotionally. This is some of the hardest time for me since our last break up. In fact, given that we just reunited about six weeks ago, I am still reeling from the energy of reconnecting with her only to be dropped into the energy of a break up.

It's really more than one person should have to subject themselves to. I've not been handling it well at all. In fact, all of the emotion has just had me completely fixated. I've felt terrible, have lost my appetite, etc.

This love stuff is terrible. Perhaps I am not cut out for it after all.

Oh, what a day...

Increasing The Fear Threshold

First, you throw down the gauntlet. Second... gee what's second... Oh, look to see who picks it up.

My note to Sally was a bit like throwing down the gauntlet, when you think about it. The real question is whether or not it'll just lay there or get picked up.

To Hell WIth The Rules!

Well, I did it. I crossed a boundary today with Sally.
I asked her to make a choice.
I asked her to choose to be with me.

It scared the shit out of me to actually ask her...

I feel like a total schmuck

That's about the only way I can describe it right now. Enough said.

"I can't do this anymore..."

Of all the words in the English language that one might anticipate hearing after you've just had probably the greatest sex you've ever had with someone, those are probably the five least likely ones that you'd likely expect to hear, right? Yeah, I know.

Those are the exact words that Sally said to me tonight. Our physical relationship (the third major phase/turning in our relationship) is now over.

Let The Light Shine Through...

It should be no surprise, after looking at everything I've written over the past few days, that this has been a long and stressful weekend for me. In fact, I've now got canker sores in my mouth and extremely strong cravings for junk food and desserts. While there may be much about who I am that I don't know, I do know that both of these are typical stress reactions for me.

As it turns out, there has been a few small rays of light this weekend.

Quote of the Day

I was looking across my Twitter feed today and came across this little gem of a quote attributed to Erica Jong:

"Jealousy is all the fun you think they had"

As I think back on my last post on the topic, On Jealousy..., I find that there's likely more than a bit of truth in it for me.

Ultimately, this is not about the specific actions of others, as much as it is getting what I want or what I feel that I deserve (translation: it's all about ME). It isn't that either of these is good or bad, right or wrong. It's also not a justification or a "get out of jail free" card for someone.

It's all just a set up for an unfulfilled expectation.

Being In Communication (or "Meet the Parents")

One of the key things about this separation is that it's requiring that a whole new level of connection and communication be in place.

It's both one of the causal factors as well as a solution.

And it's up with everyone in our lives.

STRESS!!!

Ugh!!!
With all of this stuff going on (and dredging it up to think about it), my stress level is off the charts!!

I just want to overdose on pizza, junk food, candy and desserts (pies, cakes, puddings, ice cream, etc.).
It is just really hitting me hard at the moment.

<sniffle, sniffle>

On Sex (Part 1 of ?)

One of the aspects that I've been unhappy with regarding my relationship with Sandy has been our sex life. I need to take stock of that.

One of the things that has been very fulfilling has been my relationship and sex life with Sally. In fact, it's one of the things that dynamited me out of being stuck in my relationship with Sandy.

This isn't an easy topic to think about for me. Not even close. In fact, of all the things that I've been considering what to write about, this is the one that I've felt most uncomfortable about.

With this said, it's time to dig in...

The NEED for a "Plan B"?

Given what I wrote about last night, regarding my future with Sally, I almost shudder to write this.

I met a woman this past week that I am interested in...

Maybe I am a sad man...

or at least that's the way it seems. I spent my Friday night at home watching television, checking my Twitter feed and writing my blog posts. Is it me or is that really just a sad commentary on my life?

Maybe I just need to get out more...

Maybe I am a bad man...

Seriously. I'm not joking about this. Maybe I am. The more I write and think about it, I very well might just be doing an excellent job of convincing myself that I am.

Futures With Sally [Updated]

If I had one wish, do you know what that would be?
I would wish for Sally to just say "I want to be with you for the rest of my life. How do we make that work out?"

The truth is that I'd be a seriously happy guy. The problem is that things aren't working like that with us. Here's where things are at.

On Jealousy...

Before I met Sally, I was not a jealous person. In fact, I was pretty cavalier about the whole concept of jealousy. Now, not so much. In fact, I find now that the whole jealousy thing really grates on me. So, I'm going to explore this topic a little bit...

The Ultimatum

So, during our last trip, Sandy delivered an ultimatum to me -- choose to stay or go. What do you say to that? I wasn't completely resolved about whether to stay or go, because I do love my wife. It's not as though I don't enjoy spending time with her most of the time. Yet, the demand required a response... there was no way out of it.

Holy Sheep Dip!

Boy, what a week this has been. I've been so confronted I can't stand it. I almost feel as though my head is about to pop off. I'm going to have to queue up a few posts on the various topics I've got swimming in my head. A whole lot of ground has been covered in a very short period of time.

Big Changes

Today is a landmark day for me. Sandy and I met with Ellie this morning to discuss our transition. At the end of it, we decided that what was next for us was to do was to separate. There's still a lot of stuff to work out, but the direction is clear. I'm sad, scared and totally confronted by this. More to follow in my next posts...

I say what I mean...

...and I mean what I say.

I've always been like that. I don't say things randomly or without due care. I speak the way that I write. I don't play to people's egos or any of that crap. At the same time, it's not "just the facts ma'am". While I do have an engineering background (I like to say that I'm a "recovering engineer"...) and appreciate precision when it comes to communication, I'm not limited to just what is objective and demonstrable. I am capable of communicating things that are very deep and personal with great ease... often times, I just have to sit with it for a bit.

What a day...

... and what an evening! This is a rather long post, so I'm offering you both a warning and an apology in advance. With that caveat in place, let's get started -- there's a lot to discuss!

What Scares Me

I've been through a lot of stuff in my life. Many hard situations and stuff to deal with. My relationship with Sally is probably the scariest thing in my life right now. No kidding. Sometimes, it's enough to overwhelm and consume me.

How Not To Do Your Vacation

Sandy and I recently went on our annual vacation to a very nice place. We've been going there for quite many years and have always enjoyed it. As our relationship has started to come unwound, there was some question as to whether we would actually take our vacation this year or not. It was not a a slam dunk decision, nor a perfect vacation. Far from it. Let me explain.

"You Can't Live With Them..."

So starts the old saw. I don't think that it's true, but there is some truth to it right now, at least where my relationship with Sandy is concerned. It's weird really. I do love my wife... just not in the way that I used to. That may seem curious to you, but it's what is true for me. I'm going to try and recap how things got here, just so there is some historical context for future posts.

About "Mustang Sally"...

Yes, the name is definitely an homage to the song of the same name. The reason that I like it for a character name is that it's kind of fitting with her personality and way of being. I felt that she deserved her own post, as a means of formally introducing her into the story.

I blog, therefore I am...

...likely to sleep a bit more peacefully tonight.

This is my second attempt at blogging. The first one I have (for all intents and purposes) disabled. It's kind of like an unimproved lot. It has one final post on it and that's the way it will stay. I've moved into a new space in life, so my blog needs to reflect the life change. So it goes.

I stopped blogging before for a variety of reasons, now I feel compelled to start again. Why? Let me explain...