I've Moved Out Of The House

So, after a short discussion, Sandy asked me to move out of the house until she could move out. Given I do have a place where I can go and it seems better that we be apart, I said yes. I'm now in a new "home".

It may sound bad, but it's really not. Why? Let me explain.

The fact of the matter is, at least at this point anyway, that when Sandy and I are together for any extended period of time, things just go horribly wrong.  One of us will start taking whatever conversation we're having in a direction that doesn't do either of us any good.

At this point, finding a way to have things go in a good direction would be really good! We both want that, it's just going to take different conditions than exist right now.

It's one of the reasons why I agreed to move out. I had initially considered just moving into our spare room, but she told me "I don't want you as a roommate. If we're separated, we need to be separate."

While my first reaction to this was to be more than a little pissed, I could see her point and do now see that it's a very valid one. Causing the separation will  help break the old patterns that have us locked up in ways that we cannot even see, but have tremendous negative effects upon our relationship. If my moving out was going to help move things in a productive direction, I decided that I would do that and be happy about it.

There's still a lot for us to talk about and work out. We're not even close to being where we need to be for her to relocate. As such, we're going to need to allocate the time to do the work that we need to do and look for opportunities to explore this new dimension of being related.

In spite of all that is happening that isn't good or nice, I am hopeful that out of the work that we're doing, we'll come to a new understanding of and appreciation for each other. It's about time we established a new foundation for being related.

For this, it's never too late. We both have a lot of life left to live. Whether we want to be or not, we're going to be related to each other for the rest of our lives. Might as well start working on having that be fulfilling right now!