Well, if it wasn't real enough, it's gotten much more real for both Sandy and I. Today we talked about logistics and what was happening when. Whoa. A lot to do and not much time.
Sandy's departure date is 28 December. She'll leave the state that day with a friend and the remainder of what she can fit in her car. As things stand, she's going to be gone over Thanksgiving and for a week in mid-December. That leaves a fairly small number of days between now and then... with an awful lot of stuff to be accomplished.
We've also nailed down the formal meeting date with the lawyer for this coming Friday. The last thing that I want right now is to be paying lawyers money, but it's in both of our best interests to get it done and done right the first time. Anything less is significant exposure. I can't afford to mess this one up. It'll be very costly. We also have a number of items to synchronize on regarding bills and the routine "running of the house".
Choices have been made. The pieces are in motion.
I feel good about it overall, but there is a bit of trepidation associated with the unknown factors here. Everything is up in the air (or at least it feels that way) and I am going to need to stay focused, as well as manage my stress levels. I can lose sight of that pretty quickly and then I'm screwed. Right now, I cannot afford that. I need to be focused on what there is to do. Period. Anything else isn't going to cut it.
I'd be lying if I didn't acknowledge both the fear and the loss that I am feeling right now, but I don't have the luxury of indulging those thoughts. There's a lot to manage and deal with ahead of me. There are a number of choices yet to be made. Nothing is getting easier, at least yet.
One nice thing about this is that we finally had a chance to really talk to each other today. Something that we haven't done in a long time. I'm glad for that. I'm hoping that over the next weeks we'll be able to do more of that and make some forward progress in determining what our relationship will be like moving forward. There's no lack of things to do.
Right now, it's just remembering to put one foot in front of the other.
Wow you do have a lot to do in a short about of time! Why is she leaving the state so soon? Do you all have to sell your house or are you renting? I am sure it will be hard dividing up you things. It sounds like you have been married for around 20 years. BTW ...how old are you? Lots of questions for me today:)
ReplyDeleteHa ha!
ReplyDeleteYes, you have lots of questions.
Indeed, it is short, isn't it? :-)
1. Sandy and I have been together 20.5 years, married for just over 19.
2. I plan on staying in the house
3. We've done the pre-work to identify the assets (who gets what), so that's not a big deal. It's actually the *least* contentious part of the entire deal!
The toughest issue will be to figure out how we are going to be related to each other moving forward. Everything else is just a circumstance to handle.