What a day...

... and what an evening! This is a rather long post, so I'm offering you both a warning and an apology in advance. With that caveat in place, let's get started -- there's a lot to discuss!

Given we hadn't seen each other in ~2 weeks, because of my vacation, we were both itching to see each other. She also had some planned travel, so we compared calendars and have scheduled time to be together. A very smart thing to do, since we both lead very active lives. I didn't want to leave anything to chance.

We had been in touch over my vacation and were eagerly anticipating seeing each other. In fact, eager is probably a complete understatement, at least for me. I was completely fixated on it. Whenever it comes to Sally, I am easily (and quite happily) distracted. I just can't help it. When my thoughts turn to her, I feel like a teenager experiencing being in love for the first time... But, I digress.

[Editors note: The author digresses a LOT, recommend you start getting used to it!]

Despite the planning, it appeared at one point that the day could get canceled. First, two nights ago, she started feeling like she was coming down with a cold. Well, that was like jumping from a hot tub into an ice bath! Then, yesterday, she started feeling better, but told me that sex wouldn't be an option because of her cycle kicking in (lots of cramps, midol and such -- you get the idea, eh?).

I never complained about it. I said "that's fine with me, you don't have a say over what your body does or when. Can we do lunch?" To this she agreed. Rather than doing a lunch, which can be hard for her, she suggested a meal during the time we'd previously set aside. This was perfect for both of us, so that was the plan.

From my perspective, just being in her physical presence is enough to both relax me and to get me incredibly excited (dare I say aroused) at the same time. It's absolutely glorious! So, having the opportunity to be with her at a meal was an easy decision and a great opportunity.

She had told me that there were some things she wanted to talk about in IM, a few days ago. I didn't want to miss the chance to have her tell me what was going on for her. After we ordered, I asked her straight up -- "So, what's on your mind? What did you want to talk with me about?". She said, nothing is going on and there's nothing to talk about. I probed around a little bit and tried to create a safe space for her to talk. Perhaps this restaurant wasn't all that conducive for this kind of conversation.

Still, we stayed with it. She related to me two stories. One was of a previous significant relationship and the other was a casual (but important) relationship before that. The specific details are really unimportant to my blog, but her willingness to be open and share those things with me was HUGE! it was a real breakthrough for us. I acknowledged her for sharing those things with me and let her know how much it meant to me.

We ate. We talked. We enjoyed each others company. Finally, I said, "let's get out of here". She asked me "where to?" and I replied "well, to one of our cars, if nothing else". So we proceeded to leave the restaurant and walked over to her car. She asked me "so what do you want to do?", looked up into my eyes and said "... other than that!" (with a smile).

Yes, I am that easy to read, at least sometimes. I tend to wear my heart and my emotions on my sleeve. I'm not good at keeping stuff bottled up anymore. Used to be the rule, now it's the exception. I said, "let's just sit in your car for a bit...". She unlocked the doors and we climbed in. I slid over on the seat and pulled her close to me. I was happy to be holding her in my arms, even if it was only for a little while and fully clothed.

We talked a little bit and then I started lightly kissing her. From there she was in a full-fledged battle with herself trying to resist the urge to screw my brains out -- all because of her period! (Paraphrasing what she told me... not making that up).

Well, I wasn't about to make that an easy choice! Why? Well, number one, by now, I was completely turned on. Number two, I've had sex numerous times with women while they were having their period. in fact, before Sandy went through menopause, she used to get very bad cramps and liked having sex at that time because it helped reduce the discomfort associated with them. So, if nothing else, I felt it could be therapeutic. Yes, it may be slightly messier, but so what? That's fine.

I finally told her the equivalent of "stop messing around and take me to the hotel". She drove us there, we got a room and headed upstairs. We were on each other in moments! It was grand. So we were on the bed and everything was going well, but she was still a little unsure about whether to go all the way or not. She asked me "are you sure about this?", I nodded and said yes. Then she asked me "are you really sure about this?" and I said "absolutely sure!". She had much more going on about it than I did. I didn't think it was any big deal, she definitely did.

[Editors note: The author shares these experiences for the purposes of setting context, not writing "soft porn". Indeed, if it were that, it would be a pretty miserable example of it! Still, it is very adult themed]

Being with her was magical as it always is. As we were laying with each other on the bed, we started talking. She shared a lot of things with me that she'd never shared before and admitted how scary it was for her. All of the feelings/emotions that were being brought up. It was very, very special and moving. I so appreciate the trust that she bestowed on me to share those things. It's a real honor to have someone hold you with that kind of regard.

We both talked about how much simpler this would be if it was just about sex. We both acknowledged that this was way more than that. Indeed, this is way more than that. When I am with her, I feel at home. I feel a comfort that I've never felt with anyone else. As I've stated before, I'm no Cassanova, by any stretch of the imagination. I don't think I am all that experienced, but I know what I feel with her is incredibly special.

I know that she's been busy planning for an upcoming business trip and I asked her if she'd like me to come with. As it turns out, I do have legitimate business to conduct that coincides with her trip! Life's little coincidences, eh? I didn't ask for a response right then. She was more than welcome to think about it. Her comment was "well, I don't know, I do need to get some sleep while I am there!" We both had a good laugh at that.

I told her that "yes, I understood that. Even I needed to sleep now and then." I didn't think it would be an issue. We talked a little more, kissed a little bit more and then came to the conclusion that we'd better get going. At this point, we were out many hours later than either of us had intended to be. So, we cleaned up a bit, left the hotel and went back to the restaurant, where she dropped me off at my car. We exchanged a quick kiss and were on our respective ways.

While I was overjoyed with how the day went, I was heading back to a world of work to do. I still had a number of chores to take care of around the house before leaving on a business trip, so this would mean a late night and a very early morning. We exchanged text messages upon arriving home and I told her that I was about to start the chores, so I was going to offer my good night wishes to her early.

About 30 minutes later, I got a text from her telling me that she'd enjoy having me join her on the trip... both in and out of bed! I sent back a message telling her that I really looked forward to it.

The truth is that I really DO look forward to that. I don't feel bad that I always seem to end up in bed with her, because I want her so badly. When you only see each other every so often, the drive to have sex can be almost overwhelming. I feel very fortunate (blessed even) to be with someone that affects me like that. It's great.

There's an old saying about men. We only ever think about two things -- sex and when we're going to have sex again! While humorous, there is an element of truth to it, at least for me. Still, it's only part of the equation.

The other thing that's true for me is that I enjoy being with her when we're fully clothed as well. I don't think we get to have nearly enough of that kind of time together, because of the reasons that I mentioned earlier.

For me, this trip will be a chance to make this right. I intend to see that we have a fun and satisfying experience together on all dimensions, not just sex. I am so looking forward to getting to know each other better.

I think it'll be a very positive step to help us take our relationship to the next level... and there is definitely a next level on the horizon. More on this later.