It seems like a bit of a strange phrase, but that's the equivalent of what Sally said to me today. She basically told me that she's OK with me dating someone (that isn't her).
The conversation caught me off guard, but in a very welcome way. Let me explain...
It isn't that hasn't said this before, because she has, it just wasn't quite the way that she said it today. The only thing that she was really concerned about, especially given some changes that she's making in her life, is whether the time we actually get to communicate with each other and spend together will be enough for me moving forward.
I told her that I really value the time that we spend together, no matter how much it actually is or what we do. It's important to me.
At the same time, I think that her saying this to me is a direct result of how perceptive she is.
I think that she's known that something hasn't been right with me, especially in regards to her relationship with Rick. I could go on and on about what I think about that (her relationship) -- because I fucking hate it (and not for the obvious reason) -- but that isn't germane to this conversation. Still, her continued relationship with him and discussions of working out their issues just sets me afire.
Yes, I know I need to let her do things her way and in her time. I think that this change was her way of helping me through whatever this transition period looks like. I appreciate that she was encouraging me to address my needs and not "wait for her." She was also clear to note that she felt that she would not take that as an indication that I did *not* love her. I agreed, because that would never be true for me. I love her with all my heart.
She also went to great lengths to tell me that she recognizes that jealousy is a learned emotion (I only agree partially with that thought, still...) and that she thinks it can be unlearned. The thing that makes her upset is when someone is getting up in her business and making her feel uncomfortable. I could understand that completely.
I think that her taking the time to tell me this was quite bold and brave on her part. I was impressed.
In fact, this gives me the green light to introduce my relationship with Kate in a controlled manner. The exact how and when of that is up for consideration, but I will do it at some point.
At some point, I am going to have to write about Kate a bit more. I'm not sure where things stand between her and I. We enjoy each others company and the sex has been good overall, but there have been areas of stress/strain in the relationship.
Not sure that there's much to say except that things just got a whole lot more interesting.
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